2.08.2005

some days are great, and some days i end up feeling like i got run over by a tank...this is one of those days.

for starters, one of the blogs i've been tracking took a sudden dive... the guy said he was going to kill himself, and it seemed serious. there wasn't anything i could do or any way i could contact him b/c he didn't set up the blog to receive comments or have an email address... so all i can do is sit and see if he waits out the depression and makes another post.

sometimes, when i've got the time (like now, waiting for a meeting to start at 10pm), i browse the net for pictures of real life... mostly on Flickr, where there is a lot of random variety. i just want to see what is going on, to ensure to myself that the rest of the world has kept on ticking... one of the pics was a candid shot of some girls talking in a coffee shop. another was of some kids in a playground. another of a mountain ridge, another of the ocean. one of some ice on some fragile branches.... life has continued, and i just can't wait to get back into the real world and see it, live it. in just three more weeks i'll be on my way home, to sunny California and grocery stores, gas stations, jamba juice, movie theaters and malls, Borders... i'll see children again (it feels like forever since i've been around people outside the ages of 20-60) and my Grandparents. i'll be able to pet dogs and go on runs in my neighborhood, past all the houses and different stylized yards. the future, the "real world" is so imprinted on my imagination that i can nearly taste the Thai food and a good glass of red wine, i can feel the breeze off the ocean and smell the salt and eucalyptus leaves. i'm sure everyone is like this over here, off and on. especially when the days are suffocating and packed with frustrations. it makes coping difficult sometimes when dealing with different personality types for hours and days on end, without an outlet. i have learned tolerance as well as confidence here.


3 comments:

Kate said...

Come hame safe and happy. The sun is shining in CA these days and the weather is gorgeous.

Anonymous said...

Its weird that I do the same with your pictures. I try to see more than what is in the picture. I look in the corners and edges of the world you (and all the soldier's pix) are in. I fell like I owe it to you guys to try to stand in your shoes for a minute.

Its raining and snowy in NW Ohio. The great lakes are frozen thinly, the streams and fields are flooding and the spring seems close. I heard cardinals yesterday, and I am watching for robins.

Come home safe

Anonymous said...

The new bridge is almost up. The pylons that sit in the harbor are complete and so is the cabling. Every morning I drive to the College of Charleston and pass under the road that is going to lead to it -- its got to be sixty feet higher than the end of I-26. Its waaaay up there. The on-ramp is pitched enormously steep and then turns leftward sharply. I can't imagine what it will be like driving up it. Word to the wise: There is no bike lane on this one Amber. :) The CofC built a new library. Its ginormous, and it has shelves that slide along tracks at the touch of a button. And Boeing is building a factory alongside the airport to manufacture the fuselage for the Dreamliner. A lot things are going on. I'll see you in a few weeks. All of my studies will be complete and we can hang out.

Post again soon.

-Eric

P.S. I hope that guys pulls through.