another dream entry. i just couldn't ignore this one....

first: i was in Russia, the first day of the program....and my name wasn't on the list. one of the other cadets had his name on there twice by accident, but no one thought that was in place of my name.. we were climbing this concoction of monkey-bars and logs.....and so they were going to send me home. i was very depressed, but after a few hours and repacking, i approached the teacher and told her i was not going home. i was supposed to be there and there was no way i was going to go to Russia and be there for only one day. i stomped my foot and was adamant. the teacher was both Elena (my real teacher) and that lady in my dream before who was teaching me ballet. they were not going to ship me home. the rest of the cadets were relieved because for some reason they really wanted me to stay.

second: i was in NYC, actually Brooklyn, with some people and i commented how i never thought the city was beautiful...i was like, "i've never been here since i was a baby..i didn't realize there were so many beautiful hills..." someone said, "yeah they never film them for some reason." i was stunned. and then...there were two explosions in the sky, similar to atomic bombs, and the clouds cleared. suddenly a woman who had been walking near us screamed in pain, fell to her knees, stood back up, and turned into an alien and then back into a human. i couldn't move. all of a sudden, everyone started morphing, from the inside-out. it was horrible. i could feel the transformation begin in my heart and my brain at the same time. suddenly, i was human, but something had been added. i was taller in the legs, stronger, and had better vision. everyone suddenly had this transformation. they had the bug-eyes shimmering in green, but after i transformed also it didn't seem like a big deal. occaisionally people would look normal. it was scary because we immediately recognized this as something done to us by an alien race, and what was even scarier was that we had become part of them. i felt raped. then... they were killing all the people who's bodies had rejected the transformation. so people were falling dead in the street, killed by lazers coming from the clouds. we couldn't see these aliens, but they sent their robots to the city to find us. suddenly i was watching a golden retreiver, and although it was a dog, it went up to a sign, got a piece of blue chalk, and began writing "Help Me" in graffitti style. but the robots came nearby, and it had to hide behind the sign. crazy! then i was at a farm. this house was next to a resevoir. we had to evacuate somehow, and there was a house below the resevoir, where either i lived or an old lady (i can't remember). there was an old man in the house next to the resevoir. anyhow... we were going to flood the plains and have the water run into the Mississippi (we were on the Illinois side). we took a few shotguns and blew the resevoir open. i remember, i was some kind of leader in this operation of about five people. they were all older than me. when the resevoir drained, we found acres of holes in the ground. it was a huge gravesite, only the coffins had been removed. the aliens didn't like rotting bodies so they took them away somewhere. then...i was in my BDUs, and still in my half-alien body, and i was running down the streets of St. Louis. my body was made to run. every time i tried to push off with a foot i had this extra bounce. my legs were strong, and i kept getting faster and bouncing higher and each step i had a longer stride. i ran into Iveta, and we discussed something that was annoying us (i can't remember what that was). i just kept running and running, and i thought of how they had wanted to send me back when i was in Russia (i remembered a separate dream within a dream!) -- i was angry. i kept running.

and then i woke up.

of course i have left out a lot. i just can't remember enough to make what else i remember make sense. well, not like any of this makes sense