don't really know what to write today... every day is much the same. from an outsider's point of view, i'm sure this is boring. i'm really just updating my posts to let you know i'm still alive.

ever since the dining facility bombing in Mosul, things have changed. no longer can you walk straight into any building without first getting checked by the MPs and clearing your weapon (i've not shot mine in about a month, but they're extra careful now), and they've put up barriers around the dining facility -- so there's just one entrance, to save on the number of guards that must be present. so, security is enhanced. i don't know if this has to do with the threat of the upcoming elections or if it's indefinite. at any rate, it's a necessary evil, i suppose.

the thought of getting out of the AF in 2006 and becoming a writer seems more delicious each day.... but i'm not so sure how i'll be able to live off of my writing, not having any basis to start from, not having a novel already-written in my back pocket to wow the publishers. i guess if i end up getting close to starvation or can't pay my rent, i'll get a job in the government as a civilian or go teach English in eastern Europe. it's actually nice not knowing what will happen -- my future is a blank slate. it seems much more interesting thinking of my future that way. thinking of staying in the AF for a full career.... it looms ahead of me, the timeline already flat and uneventful, full of the stresses of promotions and leadership, continued deployments.

i should get back upstairs to the office. i just came down here to look up clubs to join when i get back to San Diego. i've got 40 days left in Baghdad!
cheers~ amber dawn


Anonymous said...

Its not boring.
Kudos to the leadership for fortifying the cafeteria. BTW do terrorists strike in the same place twice? It seems to me the target value of the cafeteria lies within the perception of it being a secure place. Taken in this light the new fortifications stem the damage done on the psychological axis (after-all would you feel secure eating there otherwise?), as well as reducing the probability of a second attack.

I couldn't think of a cooler place to be than Europe -- such a diversity of stimulus is packed per square inch. Whose to say you can't write while you're there? Talk about sources for inspiration. Does your experience and knowledge in Bagh-D give you an edge or opportunity in the Civilianverse?

Educating birds everywhere about the dangers of AC units,

-Option E

Anonymous said...

I hear that. I didn't know if I was going to make the Army a career, but... I realize the military lifestyle wasn't for me. I couldn't handle the non-common sense activities going on around me and it affected my thought process.

If you are dreaming, thinking and desiring to write, then do it after you get home. Your in a combat zone. Find some job that gives you so $$$ to buy any raw materials for your journey.

I come to write in your blogger since others don't grab and grasp me as your does. I have seen one other good blog's lately but... I have other things to do at the time, to sit and reply etc.

As a fellow Californian (Ex Californian) I would tell you, go to New Mexico, like Sante Fe area and talk to other writes there. I have a cousin who is a veteran like us and he helps people re-write some parts of their novels or teaching guides so they are clean before trying to get publish.

Go with your desires and also do it in a sense of realism. I am sure you shall succeed and conquer your dreams.

Stay happy, focus and never let any others influence you to change your goals.

Keep safe and trust nothing around, especially security.


SMASH said...


I had no idea you were a fellow San Diegan!

Drop me an email when you're coming home -- we should get together, talk about blogging, writing, military stuff, etc. I'm thinking about getting a bunch of milbloggers together to write a joint book about our experiences in the Sandbox...

Mrs. Smash and I would love to treat you to dinner. You pick the restaurant. Really.

FishTaxi said...

I am glad your keeping up your blog however mundane it seems to you at the time. Its real intriging to me being an "outsider". Thanks for letting me in.

Think about coming to Alaska when you get out or try getting getting stationed here. You'd love it! Theres all kinds of little cabins you could write your great novel in.

I worked at a fly-in fishing lodge one summer on Lake Clark. Turned out that this one guest cabin (that was my favorite) was "the" cabin General Stormin' Norman wrote his book.

That was all you needed was dead rat smell in your space (on top of everything else)! I've experienced that not so eloquent whiff and know your anguish at the thought.

Stay alert, don't be humdrum & come home and write that book thats in you.


Jeff said...

Are you interested in writing a novel? Have you written stories? Your experience should give you plenty of material. I only started my blog because I read agents & editors like to writers have a web presence. I've had some stories published, but we'll see if the site helps me sell my novel ;p

Anonymous said...

How are you doing LT?

Arthur J. Feldeman

Vince said...


I thought you might reading this. Sounds like your new career is closer then the 20 years in the Sad Force Opppps I mean AF.

I just want to let you know, you served and did great, focus on some fun, happier times ahead and if they give you walking papers, don't stand and cry they don't like ya, RUN!!!! Run and do cartwheels and say "I believe in Miracles". lol


Anonymous said...

Amber, glad to hear you're coming home. I can remember the short-timer jitters - anticipation anxiety!
In response to Anonymous:
I completely respect your decision - Many years ago I made the same choice for the same reason. But civilian employers are every bit as 'non-common sense'. I hope that's not your only reason for leaving the military or else you're in for some disappointment. I don't want to say I regret my decision, but I do wish I could go back and make that decision again.
Amber - Come home safe and good luck with whatever your future holds.